rat race irony

recently, i was awakened by my tv and i found myself watching a remarkable scene. it showed a young affluent american executive type perhaps on vacation on a remote beach somewhere in Mexico, talking to an older Mexican fisherman.

"is that all the fish you caught?" he inquired.

"it's all i need" replied the old man with a smile.

"why don't you catch a lot more, then sell the ones you don't need? then you can save the extra money you make to buy yourself a bigger boat so you can catch a lot more fish," the american observed.

the Mexican explained that his small catch was sufficient to meet his needs and those of his family. the American asked, "but what do you do with the rest of your time?"

"i sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, and take a siesta with my wife. in the evenings, i go into the village to see my friends, have a few drinks, play the guitar, and sing a few songs...i have a full life."

the American interrupted, "listen to me--i have an MBA from Harvard and i can help you! by fishing longer, you can catch more fish. with the extra revenue, you can buy a bigger boat. with the extra money the larger boat will bring, you can buy a second one and a third one and so on until you have an entire fleet of trawlers. then, instead of selling your fish to a middle man, you can negotiate directly with the processing plants and maybe even open your own plant. why, you can then leave this little village and move to Mexico City, Los Angeles, or even New York City! from there you can direct your huge enterprise."

"really? and how long would that take?" asked the Mexican.

"twenty, perhaps twenty-five years," replied the American.

"and after that?"

"afterwards? that's when it gets really interesting," answered the American, laughing. "when your business gets really big, you can start selling stocks and make millions!"

"i guess after i make my millions, i can then retire to a tiny village near the coast..." the old man smiled.

the american realizing the irony, continued laughing, "sleep late, play with your children, catch a few fish, take a siesta with your wife, and spend your evenings drinking and enjoying your friends."

reflections on getting older

Getting older does not seem to be quite as bad, and it isn’t, it just takes some getting used to.

You lose hair from places that you don't want to lose it, and grow hair in places where you don't want them to grow. Every part of your body gets stiff except that one part :-) You sleep less, wake up too early in the morning for the rest of the world, and fall asleep while sitting on a chair at any time of the day. It takes pulling some muscles and breaking some bones to realize that you don't have the same reactions and quickness while playing sports like you used to; and you learn pretty quick never, ever keep up with the kids on the ski slopes--unless you want to end up like Sonny (Side-of-No) Bono.

Other than that, the taste buds seem to have gone gung-ho, and everything you hated when you were a kid, becomes a 'delicacy' all of a sudden. You get a little bit more emotional when watching movies, and you find yourself alone a lot of times because the kids are always gone doing their own thing. But there are a lot more things that you understand--and you are more patient in tolerating the terror that those little kids dish out.

Over all, you are more sure of yourself, and your perspective of things has stabilized, a sure sign of slowing down, and becoming "set in your ways". You like staying home more often, and a vacation is being able to read a good book within a couple of days instead of a couple of months. And when the kids start calling you "gross" for finding delicious humor in "breaking wind" in front of them--you know you have gone past the top of the hill and on the flipside on your way down.

The only question that remains is whether you ought to decide to take your time going down, and take in the view while you still can, and coast on down to your final resting place. Where I hope that you realize that life is nothing more than finding order and beauty amidst chaos, that the very struggle is what gives meaning to the happiness which everyone seeks, and that it only follows that the more struggles, the greater the happiness. And that giving up is death.

So this here is my toast to life! It's been a wonderful journey for me so far, well, at least not boring, and I take all the sad and happy memories, for in remembrance, we taste a little bit of immortality.... And that "...the greatest thing you'll ever learn, is just to love, and be loved in return...."

8 words which mean different to a male & female

Found elsewhere....

1. THINGY (thing-ee) n. Female...Any part under a car's hood. Male...The strap fastener on a woman's bra.
2. VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj. Female...Fully opening up one's self emotionally to another. Male...Playing football without a support cup.
3. COMMUNICATION (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n. Female...The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one's partner. Male...Leaving a note before taking off on a fishing trip with the boys.
4. COMMITMENT (ko-mit-ment) n. Female...A desire to get married and raise a family. Male...Trying not to hit on other women while out with this one.
5. ENTERTAINMENT (en-ter-tayn-ment) n. Female...A good movie, concert, play or book. Male...Anything that can be done while drinking beer.
6. FLATULENCE (flach-u-lens) n. Female...An Embarrassing byproduct of indigestion. Male...A source of entertainment, self-expression, male bonding.
7. MAKING LOVE (may-king luv) n. Female...The greatest expression of intimacy a couple can achieve. Male...Call it whatever you want just as long as we do it.
8. REMOTE CONTROL (ri-moht kon-trohl) n. Female...A device for changing from one TV channel to another. Male...A device for scanning through all 375 channels every 5 minutes.

the advantages of being in your 50's

Kidnappers are not very interested in you.
In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.
No one expects you to run--anywhere.
People call at 9 PM and ask, " Did I wake you?"
People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.
There is nothing left to learn the hard way.
Things you buy now won't wear out.
You can eat dinner at 4 PM.
You can live without sex but not your glasses.
You get into heated arguments about pension plans.
You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
You quit trying to hold your stomach in no matter who walks into the room.
Your eyes won't get much worse.
Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.
Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.
Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.
Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.